Category: Mind

Feed Their Spirit

11/8/2014

Proverbs 22:6 says: ‘train up a child in the way they should and when they are old he will not depart from it’. The word “train” is a verb, an action word. It means to teach a particular skill or type of behavior through practice and instruction over a period of time. From the very beginning you are instructing your child on many levels with the hope that with consistency, healing and doing the child will internalize the skill or behavior. This principle is true also with training your child in spiritual matters.

From before they can begin to truly comprehend what you are saying begin to bless them. Speak scripture over them. Isaiah 54:13 says that all your children are disciples, taught of The Lord and obedient to His will and great is their peace and their undisturbed composure (amplified version). Speak the word of God over your child. It will strengthen them and release the word into their spirit. The word is alive and active and will do what it has been sent to do. Say to them they can do all things through Christ Jesus, that they don't have a spirit of fear but of power, love and a sound mind. There are many scriptures that you can speak over your child's life. Find the ones that have special meaning to you and speak the scripture out over them again and again and again. Then, have them repeat the scripture with you. They will be so familiar with it that it will be easy. It will go into their spirit and when they need it that which is in them will come out.

Get a bible that is age related and read it to them. Teach them the stories of the bible. Walk them through it as a regular routine. Discuss the stories and people involved, what they did and what God did for them. Don't think that it is the responsibility of the church to teach them. They have them only an hour or two a week. You are placing disciplines in their life that will remain.

Teach them that they have a great big God that is merciful and full of love yet all-powerful. That He loves them even more than you do. Tell them they are God’s perfect plan for your family. Show them the miracles that Jesus did and that He died on the cross for all including them. Speak to them of the goodness of God. You need to herald the message of the good news to them right from the beginning.

(image courtesy of Marin/FreeDigitalPhotos.net)

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Healing Trauma

28/7/2014

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How does healing of trauma transpire?

1. Recognition is the first step. You have to realize that you need freedom in an area before you can be set free. I didn’t even realize that I was uptight in a car. Yes, I knew I hated it when we would pass a car but I was used to feeling like that. You need to beware of your symptoms or reactions. In regard to your children what behavior are they exhibiting? How are they reacting in a given situation? For example has your child fallen and cracked their head or were they bitten by a dog? These are traumatic events in a person’s life. Recognize that events in your child's life can cause trauma to them equally as much as they have in your life. They need healing body, soul and spirit.

2. When dealing with your children, it is important for you to know you have not only the right to pray for them but also the responsibility and the authority to do so. They are under your headship as their parent. If you have accepted Jesus as your Savior, you have the Spirit of God, the Almighty living in you, giving you authority to pray effectively. If they are old enough to participate, i.e. from two onward, then invite them into the pray time. Ask them if they remember when the situation happened. If they don't remember ask the Holy Spirit to bring it to their remembrance. Trust God to work in all experiences. He will!

3. At this point there may be a need for your child to speak forgiveness to another person. If that person is you as in the case of our daughter, then ask them to forgive you. Have them respond by saying I forgive you. I discuss the power of forgiveness in another chapter so I won't go into detail here. This is key! They may need to forgive someone: a teacher, a driver, a friend, a grandparent, anyone who has hurt them. There are all sorts of issues that a child has to deal with. Forgiveness removes the right the enemy has to hold a person in bondage.

4. Invite the Holy Spirit to come right into the situation and shine His light into the midst of the pain, sorrow, grief, rejection, or loss ...the trauma that your child has had whatever that is. Ask Him to heal their body, soul and spirit, mind, will and emotions. Ask Him to heal the sights, sounds and smells...all that affects the senses. God wants to heal and restore us fully.

More next week...

(image courtesy of smoked salmon/FreeDigitalPhotos.net)

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Trauma

14/7/2014

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People encounter trauma in their lives in various circumstances. Nobodies’ story is the same and the very same tragedy affects everyone involved differently. However, the fact is we put walls up to protect ourselves so it will "never happen to me again". These coping mechanisms help us but also hurt us.

The first traumatic experience I had in my life was at the age of five when a drunk driver went through a stop sign smashing into my dad’s car. I was in the front seat with no seatbelt (not invented yet...yikes that speaks of my age) and nearly went through the windshield. I hit the dashboard and woke up in hospital. As a result of that accident I stuttered for several years. My ability to ride in a car was fine until at the age of thirteen my oldest sister was killed in a head on collision. As a result of that fear gripped me and I became a great backseat driver. Not really! I would clench becoming tense and was always putting my foot to the break even though I was not driving! If Jim would go to pass a car I would be so filled with fear that my heart would race.

Trauma effects how a person reacts and how they respond to situations. In the first instant my body was hurt with my mind responding in the situation by try to protect me and help me recover. But that instance also opened a door to the spirit of fear to operate in my life. Then, when my sister died, it was as if a stronghold took place. The enemy had a doorway from the first incident but now had a platform to perform in my life. My entire being was affected.

Trauma is a deeply distressing or disturbing experience. Our entire being responds to a traumatic event and it can cause emotional shock and anxiety. Depending on the nature of the trauma, the stress can lead to depression, fear and neurosis.

(photo courtesy of nipitphand/FreeDigitalPhotos.net)

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Dealing With Rejection

7/7/2014

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So what do you do when you discern rejection in your child's life?

1. Remember, this is the work of the Holy Spirit and he wants us to have life and that in abundance. Your reliance is on him to set the captive free. Ask him to come with His anointing and lead you as you pray.

2. Depending on the child's age talk to them about the situation. We sat with Becky at four years of age and Jim asked her if she remembered her birth. She said “no” so Jim asked the Holy Spirit to come and reveal it to her. The child does not have to understand the situation. Their soul was wounded and their spirit bound and they feel the effects of that in their life.

3. After an explanation, you as the parent need to take responsibility and ask the child to forgive you. I asked Becky to forgive me for not being there, for hurting her, for rejecting her. The response to this is “I forgive you”, which Becky said.

4. Invite the Holy Spirit to come right into that time in their life. There is no time in God; He is the same yesterday, today and forever. He will come into that experience and heal the pain. Ask Him to and He will.

5. Now use your authority in Christ and take authority over the spirits of rejection, fear of rejection, self-rejection and rebellion. Bind them in the mighty name of Jesus and command then to go. Loose your child's spirit to the freedom in Christ. Please note, in no way does this have to be loud or scary. Just use your normal tone of voice but mean what you say. For us it was a precious sweet healing time.

6. Invite the Holy Spirit to fill every void and to fill your child with acceptance, love and the peace of God that passes all understanding. Let his mercy and grace flow.

Jim prayed for Becky and I that day. We had a super natural experience. He prayed that we would bond and that love would fill us both. I sat with Becky in my arms for two hours and we rocked in that chair together. We cried and cried and cried as the love of God moved powerfully to do what only he can do. It was amazing.

The thing that was most astonishing was the profound effect it had on her behaviour. She was never the same. Most people that know Becky can't believe there was ever an issue. She was obedient, respectful and fun, a pleasure to be around (she still is!) But that was a major milestone in our life. You see what we learned was you can't discipline a demon. We were trying to change Becky's behaviour by outward means but God works from the inside out. That's called grace, His divine influence on our lives and it's outward expression. When you are free inside, your behaviour is different. If your child is being harassed by a spiritual force, then you need to deal with it. In the same way, when a child gets cranky because they are tired, you need to put them to bed, if their are reacting to something spiritually you need to pray and set them free.

Watch for rejection in your child's life. We had many sessions praying with the kids forgiving friends, each other, teachers, employers, grandparents, themselves and us. Children hurt one another on the playground. They can feel ostracized from a group, like they are not good enough. Be on top of how your children are feeling and don't be afraid to talk to them and pray with them. In this way you will keep the enemy from getting a foothold in your child's life and you will train them to deal with these issues even when you are not there.

(image courtesy of arztsamui/FreeDigitalPhotos.net)

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Rejection

23/6/2014

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Rejection is something that everyone will feel during his or her lifetime. Rejection is defined as a refusal to accept, submit to, believe, or make use of. It is also a denial to consider, or grant. It can come through another person’s refusal to recognize someone, thus leaving them with the feelings of being defective or useless, like you are being spit out, vomited out or thrown away. Rejection makes you feel as if you are not worthy of that person’s affections or attention.

I don't think there is a person on the globe that has not had to deal with feelings of rejection at some point in his or her life. In fact the enemy uses any and every opportunity to bring rejection into our lives. Why? Because it is the opposite of acceptance! Our heavenly Father is love and this perfect love cast out all fear. He loves and accepts us without our performance or behavior lining up to a list of laws. Even while we are sinners he loves us. He knows exactly who we are and yet he loves us - even with all our warts and wrinkles. Rejection on the other hand is a feeling of “I am not good enough”, therefore I must try harder and harder to improve myself, and then I will find love and acceptance.

Rejection is a three-fold cord with the strands being rejection, fear of rejection and self-rejection. When a person feels rejection, fear begins to play out in their life. They begin to think people don't like me...every time I meet new people they look at me funny. The mind begins to play repetitively thoughts that no one likes me; I can't fit into this group. Our thoughts create scenarios, and accompanying these, are the feelings of rejection and fear of rejection. These two feelings lead to self-rejection. When we feel rejected by others we begin to feel that something is wrong with me. I am not pretty enough, smart enough, and athletic enough, or cool enough and I will never measure up. So, we begin to hate ourselves thus rejecting who we are and who God created us to be. We become our greatest critics and begin to make proclamations like I am so stupid or I can't even do anything. The enemy will gladly add to the list of failures and inadequacies that will increase and increase. If left unchecked, this process can lead down many ill-fated roads.

Rejection works itself out in people’s lives in various ways. Once it is unveiled you can see its devastation in our society. Children, and adults react to their feelings of rejection through rebellion, disobedience and lawlessness. The thought is: “you don't like me so I don't like you either”. If I can't get your attention by being who I am, then I will get attention whichever way I can. Rebellion is only one of the fruits of rejection. Depression, anxiety, self-harm, alcohol, drug addiction and suicide are also. Our society is full of young people harassed by rejection, fear of rejection and self- rejection.

(image courtesy of Stuart Miles/FreeDigitalPhotos.net)

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The Battle Rages Part 2

16/6/2014

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The enemy is out to destroy families. You can see the devastation throughout society.

The big problem is our lack of recognition that we are in a battle for the very hearts of our children. Without recognition there is no battle going on and the enemy is having a heyday in family life. We need to fight the good fight of faith and war for the minds and hearts of our families. It is a battle and it needs to be consistently waged just like every other area of parenting. Consistency is key. Paul says to Timothy in 1Timothy 1:18-19 to recall the prophecies made over him that he might fight the battle well. Those prophecies spoke to Timothy's destiny and Paul was exhorting him to fight for them. Why? Because we have an enemy that wants to steal destiny from our hearts the same as he will from our children if he is unchecked!

Paul later says to Timothy in chapter 6:12 to fight the good fight of faith. We need to fight for our children and teach them to do like wise. You wouldn't let your child cross the street without teaching them to stop and look for traffic. At first you would say take my hand and then when it is safe to go you would cross the street together. Their spiritual walk is the same. You are the one fighting for them but in doing so you are modeling to them how to pick up their sword and join the battle against their souls.

I would like to pray with you at this moment. Some of you have not even been aware that you are in a battle for your children's very destiny. Others of you may have just given up. The enemy has you thinking that you are not making a difference so what's the point. Still others are just weary. So I invite you to pray this prayer with me.

“Father thank you for the gift of my child/children. I ask that you would open my eyes to the battle that is going on for the hearts and minds of my family. I ask for wisdom and revelation. I break off all deception and every lie that the enemy would want to seed in my life and I ask that you would plant truth deep within me. I ask for a warring spirit that I would fight the good fight of faith for my family. Strengthen me by the power of your spirit in Jesus mighty name. Amen.”

(image courtesy of Witthaya Phonsawat/FreeDigitalPhotos.net)

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Spirit, Soul & Body

18/5/2014

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People are complex and that most definitely includes little people. We are fearfully and wonderfully made according to Psalm 139. God created us with a spirit, soul and body. They are all essential to being alive. Our spirit, soul and body are interdependent and intricately interwoven into our wholeness and welfare.

We have needs in our life that are very basic to our survival. We need air to breath, water to drink and food to eat. If we live in a society where clothes are essential just to keep warm in a cold winter climate clothes become a basic need too. These are some of the basic needs of the human body.

Then there is the soul. The soul of a person is the mind, will and emotions. Our environment affects our soul. For example, if a child grows up in a stark barren place void of input, they will be stunted in their development. It may be that the child is bright but without the opportunity to grow in knowledge or the stimulation of touch and human relationships, he or she will remain stunted until given appropriate nurture. When given the correct stimulus at the appropriate age a child will respond and develop intellectually. In this book I am not going to discuss childhood development but I am going to focus in on developing and caring for the spiritual side of you child. This is not to say that meeting your child's needs in these other areas isn't important because it is. We, Jim and I, discuss how you as a parent can influence a child’s soul in a godly manner in our other book, 24 Secrets to Great Parenting.

Paul says in 1Thessalonians 5:23b: “may your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless”. Notice the holistic approach. You are a spirit being and what happens to you in one area of your life can have an affect on your entire being. We are hearing much about bulling among school-aged children. This bulling does not just hurt the child physically but emotionally it can result in the child not eating, withdrawing, and becoming anxious, fearful and depressed. This can lead to self harming and eventually being suicidal. It affects their whole being.

We are spirit, soul, and body and what happens in one area can have an outcome that will affect the child's behavior and their belief system. The bible says that as a man thinks so is he. What your child is thinking and believing is very important and you have a responsibility to keep watch over their being, their entire being!
(image courtesy of David Castillo Dominici/FreeDigitalPhotos.net)

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Feed Their Spirit

Healing Trauma

Trauma

Dealing With Rejection

Rejection

The Battle Rages Part 2

Spirit, Soul & Body

Bonnie Inkster

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